Monday, 13 January 2014

Text message conversation I imagined on recent trip to my local mini supermarket.

- Just going to shops, can I get you anything?
- Thanks! Toothpaste; Earl Grey tea; and the I-Spy book of Oxford.
- …Ok. But I'm only going to the little Sainsbury's. What if they don't have it?
- Then normal tea's fine.
- No, I meant… what if they don't have the I-Spy book of Oxford?
- Huh? Of course they'll have it! This is the middle of London! What self-respecting mini supermarket would fail to stock the I-Spy book of Oxford?
- You're probably right. But, just in case?
- Well. If for some strange reason they HAVE run out, just get me the I-Spy book of Edinburgh.
- …Ok. Fine.



17 comments:

The Kitchen Cynic said...

To be fair, i bet a huge proportion of tourists in London also visit Oxford. If only to find some Early Grey tea.

I understand from a colleague who graduated from there, that upon being asked by a tourist for directions to "the university" one directs them to Brookes, the others being Colleges...

Anonymous said...

Can you get me that magazine with the massive eyes, it looks like it comes with cool free stuff. I mean, when you're getting magazines for everyone anyway...

Sarah-L-B said...

I know a place in central London where you can buy several teas including apple, banana, coconut, vanilla, jasmine, earl grey, russian caravan, assam, kiwi and plum. Although of course you do have to venture all the way to Chinatown for that.

Shappeybunny said...

My local corner shop in South London literally sells everything. I was in there once when a customer came in, and asked "Have you got any swordfish?" The man behind the counter didn't even look up, just nodded towards the freezer. I don't live anywhere particularly posh, and it's not an "ethnic" food shop.

Pure Teen Lard said...

Curse you, Finnemore! Now I need to know what the other two I-spy books on that stand are and I never will!

Edmond Dantes said...

It's not particularly clear what this I-Spy book is. Is it a book with pictures of Oxford with little miniature things placed around it for kids to spot? Is it a book with pictures of Oxford? Is it a tour guide of Oxford, only written cryptically so it's like a scavenger hunt?

Laura G said...

I like the way someone has chosen the Daily Express, folded it carefully, seen the light and put it back.

Samantha said...

I hope you didn't forget to tick them off in your I-Spy book of London.

It's highly likely John and Kevin casually browsed through them before choosing their Sunday papers.

Anonymous said...

To Pure Teen Lard:
The one behind Edinburgh is "London's Transport" and the one behind Oxford is "On A Ferry". Don't ask me how I know this or why I have so much free time to spend on looking at every I-Spy book ever published. Don't judge me. YOU wanted to know!

Pure Teen Lard said...

Thank you, Anonymous, I can now sleep easy . . .

Anonymous said...

Well, obviously, the I-Spy Book of Oxford is a must have in any shop...

Anonymous said...

I've never seen the I-Spy book of Oxford in Oxford... maybe it's to help you find Oxford?

Lillian Bellamy said...

Hey Mr Finnemore! What news of Cabin Pressure? I am so looking forward to Zurich (possibly?)

Destiny Emerald said...

I-SPY A BALLOON was a literary disappointment and I-SPY LITTLE ANIMALS thrust me into a hellish spiral filled with vaguely condescending, furry little bastards.

And the animals were hard to find, too!

Lydia said...

John Finnemore, thank you for existing. Thank you for creating this blog and all the other things you have created that have made me so very happy. Also, I see that you draw. THANK YOU. Please keep existing!

Sarah Gallienne said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Sarah Gallienne said...

Is it bad that i read that in the voices of "Martin & Arthur" lol, cant have too much listening time of Cabin Pressure XxX