Two urgent questions.
What have the mussels done to upset the people of Normandy?
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And what are the people of Kent doing that they don't want the horses to see?
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Tuesday, 19 August 2008
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- John Finnemore
- I am the man in this photograph of me. Writer, comedian and actor. I wrote Cabin Pressure, and now write John Finnemore's Souvenir Programme, and Double Acts.
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19 comments:
Moules are not allowed to drive down that particular street ... Normands protest against anything and anything ... difficult to tell with them ...
As for the Equus problem, it looks as though Kentish folk are painting the horse's fetlocks overnight just for a laugh ... difficult to tell with them too ...
Oh you lucky lucky man. What you have stumbled across is the little known practice of Horse hibernation. Once commonplace this arcane practice is now only seen in small rural communities. The onset of cooler weather heralds the start of horse hibernation where the animals will be wrapped in straw, (more recently replaced with an old quilt and duct tape as in this example), and left to see out the harsh winter in snug seclusion. Only at Easter when the worst of the chill has passed will the beasts be returned, stiff and hungry, to the spring fields. Notoriously poor survival rates have lead to many farmers keeping their livestock awake through the winter months and simply putting them indoors instead. This has of course lead to the demise of the Farmers traditional 3 month holiday in the Maldives.
Don't you know that Normandy has been invaded by Mussels hundreds and hundreds of years ago, that it set off a very looong war between France and the Country of Mussels and that these finally had Jeanne D'Arc burnt on the Market Place ????
As a Rouen-native I've been taught all about it as soon as I started going to school.
And that terrible episode of the History of France also explains why French people speak the language of Mussels so awfully bad - apparently... but actually they just want to trick the Spies-Mussels who pretend to come to France for holiday.
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