Farewell Bear Facts - Uskerty

…As previously discussed here, complete with entire deleted final scene. Which reminds me, that deleted scene will be one of several, such as  the bit from St. Petersburg in which Martin and Douglas talk about their fathers, included as a bonus track on the complete CDs, which will be released on January 15th, but which is available for pre-order here.

(Sorry, Amazon haters - I do take your point, but they're offering a 35% pre-order discount, and it seems unfair not to point people at the place with the cheapest price.)

- Anyway, back with Uskerty - finally the companion piece to Johannesburg, where the crew are split Martin & Carolyn / Douglas & Arthur for the first time. A split which worked so well, I rather wished I'd done it before -  though arguably the Douglas and Arthur duo, at least, wouldn't have been as effective before Douglas reached his Series Four evolution. 

- I've talked about visual jokes before, and how radio is actually the perfect medium for them, because you have such precise control over what your audience sees when. Generally, I give Douz as an example, because it has both the unfilmable final cricket team / firetruck / desert highway scene, and also the scene where it's revealed at the end of a tense and serious scene that Douglas has - for sound plot reasons - been in his underwear throughout. But there are examples of two more varieties of radio visual jokes in Uskerty. First, teasing the listener with deliberately withheld information. Finn McCool III is discussed, produced, and admired with the listener having no idea what he is, before it's finally revealed he's a sheep… and a stuffed one. This type of joke obviously can, and often is, done on TV; but it generally looks quite forced, as the camera deliberately avoids showing the thing we're interested in. Similarly, I suppose you could shoot the Douz scene with Douglas only visible from the neck up, but it would look odd, and would give away that something was up. 

The other type is my favourite, which is to remind the listener about something visual that they already know, but have forgotten to keep picturing. So, when Martin finally arrives at the airport, we picture him looking bedraggled, and because it's just happened we probably remember he's fallen in goose poo. But hopefully with each of Douglas' questions:

MARTIN  Douglas, quick. I need your help.
DOUGLAS  Martin … Good Lord, you’re soaking wet.
MARTIN  Yes, well, it’s raining outside. Look …
DOUGLAS  What happened to your uniform?
MARTIN  I tore it falling out of a tree …
DOUGLAS  Yes, but what’s that all over it?
MARTIN  Oh, er, goose droppings, but …
DOUGLAS  Is your hand okay?
MARTIN   No, a bee stung me …
DOUGLAS  What are you carrying?
MARTIN   What does it look like?! A stuffed sheep!
DOUGLAS  You see, Arthur? The master.

…we recall something else that we already knew happened to him, and revise our mental image of him accordingly. And that's a joke you can only do in sound only. 

- Ben's performance of the tree-climbing scene is a thing of beauty and a joy forever. That is all. 

- Sometimes people ask why Carolyn's bad mood at the beginning was never explained. Well, for some reason - probably because Roger and I were enjoying taking our… sweet… time… in the film noir scenes so much - this episode ran way, way overlong; and as well as the deleted scene in the other Uskerty post, and another deleted scene about opera which will be on the CD, we also had to lose the following dialogue between Martin and Carolyn as they're waiting for a lift. We were right to cut it, because it sort of over-explains things we already know, but just for your interest: 

5.   CAROLYN:         Good. Put it in your pocket

6.   MARTIN:          Yes, alright!

PAUSE. THE RAIN

7.   CAROLYN:         I hate it that I can't pay you, you know

8.   MARTIN:          So do I.

9.   CAROLYN:         You deserve to be paid. And also, it makes me feel ... unprofessional. You know, silly old woman, thinks she can run a business, can't even pay her staff

1.   MARTIN:          Look ... it's alright. I know you would if you could.

2.   CAROLYN:         Yes. I mean ... actually ... I could pay you. If you'd like.

3.   MARTIN:          Er ... yes. I would like. Have I not made that clear?

4.   CAROLYN:         Not a salary. But I could give you a lump sum. Quite a big one, actually. As back-pay.

5.   MARTIN:          Really? But ... how?

6.   FX:              CAR APPROACHES

7.   C AND M:         Hello! Hello! Please! Hello!

8.   FX:              ... AND PASSES

9.   CAROLYN:         Gordon's made his annual offer to buy Gerti back.

10.  MARTIN:          What? After what happened in St Petersburg? He's got a cheek!

1.   CAROLYN:         Yes, that's a version of what I said. But still. He's offering seventy thousand for her. It's way more than I'd get anywhere else.

2.   MARTIN:          I hope you told him no!

3.   CAROLYN:         I told him many things, starting with no, and getting progressively more creative. But I could change my mind.

4.   MARTIN:          No! Of course you can't! He tried to steal Gerti, Carolyn! He doesn't ever get to have her now! (BEAT) When did he call you?

5.   CAROLYN:         In the taxi on the way to the airport

6.   MARTIN:          Ohhh ...

7.   CAROLYN:         What? What 'Ohhh'?

8.   MARTIN:          Nothing.