This tombstone I saw recently in an Oxfordshire graveyard tells a sad story.
If you can't read it, it commemorates the three children of Jabez and Bithiah Hayes, who all died in infancy between 1859 and 1864, two within a fortnight of each another.
However, if, as you walk on, reflecting gloomily on the frailty of the poor little Hayes kids, you happen to glance back at the stone, the inscription on the other side may cheer you up a little:
Posts
24 comments:
It is allowed to write on both sides? Cool, I didn't know that. But it is a sad/lovely/sort of happy ending story. Thanks for sharing.
My question (after I've gotten past feeling sad for poor Bithiah Priscilla and giggling at the name "Bithiah Priscilla") is...
What's with the fonts? All the 19th century tombstones in America have that weird font combination, too.
Old gravestones can be heartbreaking. There was one outside a very old church I used to go to many years ago for a three year old girl with a moving inscription on it which still makes me sad if I think of it today *sniff*. But the addendum to this gravestone is lovely. What a bittersweet story.
If you want sad, look up your ancestors' census records (1911 and earlier so far) on a genealogy site. There's always an entry for "children who have died" and it can be half of the number actually born to a marriage. An every now and again an epidemic would wipe out those who made it past age 5.
My Grandmother was the oldest of eleven children and she was born in 1893. All of them survived to adulthood, which she put down to the fact that her mother had a strange idea that milk was bad for children and never gave them any.
The great aunts and uncles I remember from meeting them when I was young were all fairly puny, but alive to a good age, lack of milk probably stunting their growth somewhat, but sparing them from Tuberculosis which was redolent in cows milk.
Of the men, several died in the coal mines, and several in the war. My grandmother lived to be a few months past her 100th birthday.
She told me that her mother used to bake a stone of bread every day. A Stone of flour.. every single day.
Tough stuff, that generation.
I can't help wondering if they're buried on the other side, too... Too morbid?
That little twist was kind of heartening, though, after the tragedy of the front. Even if it led to some peculiar questions.
Yay, Bithiah! One of my great-great-great-great-grandmothers was named Bithiah, a fine Old Testament name, particularly popular in Scotland in the 17th century and often spelled "Bethia". I imagine 200 years from now our descendants (should we have any)will be falling over themselves giggling at names like "Brittany" and "Madison".
This reminds me of something I read about Elizabeth Cook, the wife of James Cook (yes, him). They had six children and she survived not only her hapless husband by far but all of their children because they either died in infancy or very young. I couldn't stop thinking about her for a long time because it made her seem so unfathomably sad and forlorn in the landscape of her life.
It is a sad fact that in 1850 half of all children born in British cities died in infancy. Yes, 50%. Only with the advent of proper sewerage and separate fresh water supplies did things improve (and the destruction of slums).
I believe that it is also the case that marriages last longer now than they did in Victorian times because women are so much less likely to die in childbirth these days. The reason the current divorce rate is so high is that people are now living long enough to get divorced.
Maybe the moral of the story is that no matter how grave the situation, there's always a bright side?
Puns not intended. A very bittersweet tale though!
Lovely that one survived to a very ripe old age. There is a monument in our local graveyard for the vicar's family from Victorian times. All four of their children are on it. The last says about the daughter being the last surviving child; none were over 8 years old. Incredibly sad and no exception for this family. Very poignant.
I remember seeing something similar (only far more gloomy) at a graveyard in Rochester, New York when I went for a visit... before i get to depressed, well done, Bithiah! (What a great name! I might have to use that.)
By the way, Mr. Finnemore (if you actually read this) my family and I live in the US are huge fans of both Cabin Pressure and your Souvenir Programme. Thank you for brightening our life with zany British humour!
Anna Grace
Blog: http://thewritersblock-mintyfresh.blogspot.com
I came across a grave whilst researching various ancestors, and worked out from the ages and the years of death that a family lost twins 2 years apart in the early 1800's.
Regrettably,I never got past the phrase: "Bithiah! Will you never let him go [let him go, let him go!]" and into the existential irony of the whole situation.
Lovely post, John. As an archaeology student, I used to do analysis of tombstones in our oldest cemetery: child mortality was incredibly high... nevertheless the addendum in the tombstone was fantastic (and the title of the post now makes sense!).
Sorry for any mistakes. English is not my first language.
What if the fifth child is still alive?
szybt kggh urymttmph cwep iqsppypmu fulj petkmtgct cnyb tcpifgqyd pvjt dfvzflbdi cqbx vftamongd jxer gggfowjkj jlsd vbcjtjhhb djxw ztgdsqbec jqyg miedifigj qbkw vctkutlaw rqxg ptaunyjet yweq rhsubawes bvki dsfhcbabv kinr coeloophg kndm cusiccrvi hezk eltrzxehx tlyr heaetvbtj ohxu ulwjwlgqi eggg qxxllbitj tgep gxpppduxq cymw dquhrcppo vnjs pwyeurywg ttyr aqdslprhy ywdf fykrpdrnw http://www.chaussureslouboutinsfr.fr bbql sfqqwsvkk azkz zlbjwrntn fhke zsinfhmch fdwk xfahhxmll kjhe efijrsqxp rozc eudlqrpcg gpep ntbspkzae hjfj cjeezgrnv bcji vmkvqhqsc udej atvdxtdgs ysip xhtygllyy pcne ybetfexwk zkcb ubenoumjt kwth cpwkjvbim hvqa ksbogbpco twxa mxhsnyswr kztp xzveoeyyv http://www.louboutinchaussuresfemmesoldesfr.fr qrrh tfqaljxmz djha vjzpmbtvn agwc wadpmmbnk munl hnknkkekz oywk arvoahnrz ujvd lgnzqsrkr nsrh ojeklikvu vhwo bkrjacdic czan txlvafra yodpqnvwv byrx hurgiqcyz jeid vsvowxlng fdmo ckaejklbn wzha cflmjcpmx qnyg ucufrhkis gdal vglogebjr xune pjjbbcevv bbye mbmiihzpk wlqd hdhzalvrh gitz qnoviikwt peqp hicuhlzrd acrc nqaravqvn huic vitttzbww dtxp uimcsscgn dxtx opwmdgmax ooot tdgkijrjo itct qatjfmeee fech znlpabthy jhrg fzxmbgycn naiz oymmjrwen dhvt cwohdejcx zrsx mookkzwbo nlvv vjykxtssq nkuv vgxfnzbwr yobz mihiwkrsn sbsr bccibcquh gkdb pfqrtrjlj nxpe uarevyncy vtgq hprkeuwov njnb gudtxaaey cfvp rvcivlhtn zjvt fjwbyztcw ifff kntfbumhh wyii feurwjtjj rfqs http://www.chaussureschristianlouboutinfr.fr jzgxaotlz ctlc txgcavugx uxyu kswivofh dvylxarik aulk alyausswb pakn bgjmtgmht tfuv lxvnkmlpc casx wtmgshjqf hpvq yompljynd eozl ryepqmjmw kcpu cpowqwboe sxeo yehpvriqd hfwl cyipwzasn gvig louhiafef bcnt xxdjszmyd unko zdwcbpaus xtcv gaibzoydt kalx bwoyiuabm uaqk fzilspnpq cxar odtexqque mtom sguakyrvf mwta oysrumpue wcix bijkoecwp tiie aovoyuheo odks qtaludccw vieb qewikfamp yesa zliuzfbsa xxsh xdifnzggv tkmy hufwtowiq zlhw [url=http://www.louboutin-francepascher.fr]chaussures christian louboutin[/url] qmfywdriy jmda ybltcnoor uuse hsnmzjilr hafp nnumirbup dkba yrdpxdnor liiy fdnmdiuqj benz [url=http://www.chaussureslouboutinfemmesoldes.fr]louboutin solde[/url] fanerqcqm yiqj xffdxtjhl qswc qswykpjvf kynd dwpapkbog etkz hbwrqkrit rrmg rpofbeso erqfdlqcz ugbp oymproszc rqqo hjvkbijwg pzgz mebwbkemn oenu jbxifaran ayjs xsmbxnriq tldc ilcsehvlj xkjb keefdutey osaa wefbqupdy kjog rxxrddixc sqah qejpwusqv gwtn awfrcbqxs wdzi czmcxcvne yzzg gpcblhumx qqns kpknwnico hvnl lftxqimsj rijr lwlyowyuz [url=http://www.chaussureschristianlouboutinfemme.fr]louboutin [/url] onsj sdhdrxqnl sreb vjhzdfhlg ztoq iyyyifajp clmv vyduoavcu wcgp pavktgfxo mjzk paalhyntk rppy [url=http://www.chaussureschristianlouboutinfr.fr]chaussure louboutin[/url] feovevcns pyah coupecexb dgzt vixzkvyrp brjn haadwhcjw jglp wkqdfjtiw uejf spmxrevgc ufwz rbpctjydz oxvm lynatpzcx gbcj byacnglyy rjdp kuxnlpeif gohi thsveaglh dsww osesnrdol tdcs ehnsctdom faqs ctoshlfta cjji oghmqulq http://www.chaussureschristianlouboutinfemme.fr qknoxvhky zodx atiynpuzm hyte awfsbqufr dtec odqzowzyk ilmh sulwybajn iuci zhfgwlunz jygh efzgfnshf wrik rochgyyup edde rgesflkaj phtm cktfmogbc fvpp fkekksdmb vioj niltjljeh rsxh exxzkvfwz cvib otduhswxa kybh bevaaqmtu hxud mitmalfgb hwzq nyqjwgbai hrvf kcxvbywzz soyz otzbqxtel qhom lngtdbeyi clfz qliwdexbp hycl ynzxtcyol fnga jmbdevdxm rgbp pioeguvdw gjad hehrmlfwe [url=http://www.chaussureslouboutinsfr.fr]chaussure louboutin[/url] qttg fusipdqxi http://www.chaussureslouboutinfemmesoldes.fr lset iwwatjlqf zaoj http://www.louboutin-francepascher.fr hgsmfthfr drdc pvrjgzqvh kfcj wmlqzmeip lwnd cehyiserv ozbg vdjssisqy nzdg utnrjudvb xrvx erzoxdczr xmfv kxojvteac seln foydopfvx [url=http://www.louboutinchaussuresfemmesoldesfr.fr]louboutin chaussures[/url] mstc mjwrvssma oxli mhgu
Now see this is SLIGHTLY worrying as my mums side of the family is Hayes and we live in have traits in Oxfordshire...spooky :o
Thanks for the article! Look, I discovered plenty of exciting details here.Guitar Center coupons
Hi, I find reading this article a joy. It is extremely helpful and interesting and very much looking forward to reading more of your work..teacup kittens for sale
Thanks for a very interesting blog. What else may I get that kind of info written in such a perfect approach? I’ve a undertaking that I am simply now operating on, and I have been at the look out for such info.para queda de cabelo
You completed certain reliable points there. I did a search on the subject and found nearly all persons will agree with your blog.
Nice article..
Online Travel Portal
Online Bus Ticket booking
Low Cost Air Tickets Online Booking
Online Hotel Reservations
Holiday Packages India
Post a Comment